America has a fascination for some reason with the English monarchy. One possible reason is that the Father of our country, George Washington, had no children of his own to pass the presidency down to. Even before he became president some framers of the Constitution advocated for some sort of monarchy. The concept never got any real traction and lost out to the republican faction that believed elected executive was much more democratic. Besides, the main cause of the Revolution was King George III’s intransigent position on Colonial taxation and rights.
This love-hate relationship with the King and his rule was knocked around by various colonials from time-to-time. But it was not until Thomas Jefferson explicitly laid out 27 specific grievances in the Declaration of Independence that the Continental Congress expressed its true feelings and dissatisfaction with the King’s rule. At least 16 of those grievances were directed at King George III. Any of which could have been determined treasonous. Ben Franklin must have certainly understood the ramifications of sending the King a nasty document when he said,” We must, indeed, all hang together or, most assuredly, we shall all hang separately. ”
At one time the relationship between England and her colonies was described as paternal. England was the “Mother Country” and the colonies her loving children. An interesting concept. However, from a psychological point of view, if England was the Mother Country, then the King was the father. I am not sure where Parliament fits into this analogy; but the argument could be made that the colonies had real “daddy issues” with George III.
It is estimated that at anywhere from 15 to 20 percent of the colonial population, some say closer to a third, were loyalist. It is believed that anywhere from 60,000 to 80,000 loyalists split the scene during the war and headed for jolly ole England or Canada rather than live under patriot or rebel rule.
And here, almost 250 years later, despite Jefferson’s “long train of abuses and usurpations” against the monarchy, we find ourselves still obsessed with the the trials and tribulations of English royalty. In March of 2021 we (the Colonists) opened our hearts to a prince with real daddy issues: Prince Harry, who claims his daddy, King Charles III, referred to him as a “spare.” There is a lot going on between Harry, his wife Megan and the Royal Family. Anybody who has watched The Crown on Netflix can tell you Buckingham Palace could double for some sort of halfway therapy house for dysfunctional family members–a place with real mommy and daddy issues.
I guess Harry had had enough and decided to leave the looney bin and live in LaLa land instead. In a loyalist turned rebel move he washed up here in the USA, a royal now a colonist. In a recent interview with NBC News’ TODAY co-anchor, Hoda Kotb, the now defrocked prince said: “You know, home – home for me, now, is you know, for the time being, is in the States.”
The British, however, did not take kindly to his bolting for the Colonies. The Daily Mail called Harry “the Duke of Delusion.” Some called for the His Royal Highness and wife “to be thrown over the balcony”–more of a Putin move and not fitting in with English tradition. With all the ill will coming at Harry, you cannot really blame him for skedaddling across the pond. I am sure Harry is not the Frankenstein monster some in the British press are making him out to be. But in reality it seems like he has made a good choice considering some of the monarchs’ antics of the past.
Follower of Anthony van Dyck, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons
Americans trying to keep track of the English monarchy have to wade through various houses of royalty like Tudors, Yorks, Stuarts and Windsors. And in those houses there is a subset of Henrys, Georges, Jameses, Charleses and Elizabeths. There are so many of them it takes a score card and numbers to figure out which Charles was beheaded and which one went into exile. For the record Charles I was beheaded January 30, 1649 forcing the future King Charles (II) to flee to France. And, now we have Charles III on the throne with one of his sons basically in self exile.
For centuries people have been trying to keep track of the six wives of Henry the VIII and their fate. Whether you need to know this for a test or just want to become familiar with a historically significant bit of information, there are several well-known tricks to keeping Henry’s queens straight in your head: Divorced, Beheaded, Died, Divorced, Beheaded, Survived. (Are we starting to see a pattern)*
wikiHow
Oliver Cromwell bids the beheaded King Charles I a fond farewell into the afterlife.
Bridgmanart (Public Domain)
There is a lot to historically unpack in England at this time. But to keep it simple Charles I believed in the divine right of kings. He had his clashes with Parliament and religious Puritans, namely Oliver Cromwell. Ironically, some of Jefferson’s “long train of abuses and usurpations” hurled at George III 130 years or so later were levied against Charles I causing an English civil war. The ensuing civil war found Charles and his Royalists on the losing side.
After his defeat, the Puritans took the radical and unprecedented approach that a sitting King could be put on trial. Cromwell’s New Model Army purged Parliament of members who supported Charles. A new Parliament, derisively referred to as the “Rump Parliament,” was ushered in to try the King for treason. Cromwell and his “Rumpers” found the king guilty. They made quick work of the verdict and three days later they had Charles beheaded. Even Lord Haw-Haw, the Englishman turned German propagandist during WWII, was given a longer shrift in his treason conviction in 1946. Despite being hung, he was able to keep his head on his shoulders and off a pike. After Charles’ execution Cromwell becomes Lord Protectorate of England, a fancy title for head Protestant-in-charge. This opened up a whole new can of conflict for English monarchy.
Oliver Cromwell is an interesting case in history. In 1658 he falls ill from malaria, and maybe comorbidities. He becomes what we would call today an anti-vaxer. Being a staunch Protestant and Puritan he refuses the only known treatment at the time, quinine. Because it was discovered by Catholic Jesuit missionaries, he decides not to partake of the holy water. According to the National Library of Medicine, quinine “was referred to as the ‘Jesuits’ bark,’ ‘cardinal’s bark,’ or ‘sacred bark.’ These names stem from its use in 1630 by Jesuit missionaries in South America, though a legend suggests earlier use by the native population.”
As I mentioned earlier, there is a lot to unpack with English history and it is not for the faint of heart. When Cromwell died he was given a fine state funeral and was buried in Westminster Abbey. But not for long. Like the the French Revolution, when the French mob turned in on itself it ended up guillotining 10,000 people. Once hailed as conquering hero, Cromwell’s image was popped like a Chinese weather balloon over the Atlantic. The mobs hit the bricks.
When the Rumpers lost power, Parliament brought back the monarchy with Charles II. According to historycollection.com, after Charles II was restored to power he “pardoned everyone except those who had played a direct role in the execution of his father.” English public opinion, or mob mentality, turned on the deceased Cromwell. Like dogs looking for a lost bone in the backyard, the a mob, armed with pickaxes and shovels dug up Cromwell’s remains. He was then treated to a treasonous posthumus execution: hung and later decapitated. I am not sure if beheading is just for the living. According to wikidiff.com, the difference “is that beheaded is to have had your head cut off while decapitated is with the head removed.”
In any case, the end result was that Cromwell’s head was placed on a pike and hung atop Westminster Hall. But it wouldn’t stay there forever. And what would be a good story like this if there were not some juicy conspiracy, theories like the remains were not actually Cromwell’s. Some believe the remains could have been Charles’ I. A 17th Century version of where is JFK’s brain.
On 30 January (the date being chosen to coincide with the anniversary of the execution of Charles I) the bodies (Cromwell and two associates) were symbolically hanged at Tyburn, and, for good measure, then decapitated. This was insufficient to sate the desire of the mob for vengeance: the heads were subsequently displayed on poles outside Parliament and the bodies deposited without ceremony in an unmarked grave.
The Exhumation and Posthumous Execution of Oliver Cromwell: worldhistory.us
Cromwell’s skull remained on Westminster Hall until the late 1680s when the English equivalent of a Nor’easter snapped the pike and brought Cromwell’s’ head back down earth. It was picked up by a guard who stashed the head inside his chimney. For some reason the government was “eager to see the head returned to its pike.”
A drawing of Oliver Cromwell’s head from the late 18th century. author unknown, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons The Wilkinson Head of Oliver Cromwell and Its Relationship to Busts, Masks and Painted Portraits, Biometrika
The head, however, bounced around from hand-to-hand. A French collector once put it on display; two brothers bought the head for what in today’s money would be close seven thousand pounds; and in 1815 it ended up hands of the Wilkinson family. According to historycollection.com, “The Wilkinson family kept the skull in their home and were happy to show it as a curiosity to any prominent guests who came to visit. The skull remained in their possession for over a century, stored inside a simple oak box and passed down through the generations. Finally, in 1960, Horace Wilkinson decided that his rather grim family heirloom deserved a proper burial and contacted Sidney Sussex College, which agreed to bury the head on the campus. And in 1962, a few of the living Wilkinsons gathered with representatives of the college for a small ceremony where the head was finally laid to rest.”
We have become more civilized today. This is not 1594 Shakespeare’s Richard III when Lord Hastings finds out he is sentenced to be beheaded and told: “Make a short Shrift, as he longs to see your Head.” It is obvious that citizen Harry does not have to worry about losing his head today over marriage vows, family squabbles and “daddy issues.” Today’s monarchical antics are mere slap fights compared to the political head rolling and religious affairs of the past.
*Also joining this headless list is Thomas More, Lord Chancellor, “a devout Catholic, he refused to acknowledge the divorce of King Henry VIII from Queen Catherine, (of Aragon Henry’s first wife) thereby refusing to acknowledge the King’s religious supremacy. He was charged with treason, found guilty and beheaded in 1535, with his head then displayed from Tower Bridge.”
historyplace.com
https://www.sparknotes.com/history/american/declaration/section2/
https://www.ushistory.org/us/11b.asp
https://www.royal.uk/charles-i
https://www.worldhistory.org/Oliver_Cromwell/
ttps://historycollection.com/strange-story-oliver-cromwells-head/3/
mystoryorhistory 